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Can A Vagina Fall Off? And Other Things I Googled During My Bikini Wax

I hope you’re sitting down for this. In the spirit of full disclosure, I am currently unable to sit down with any sort of comfort. Let me explain why – last night I had my first ever Brazilian bikini wax. Now your reaction to this, as far as I can tell, will be one of three. …

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A Facebook Conversation With a REAL Man (Warning: Language)

So on Wednesday, as I sat licking my wounds about the results of this election, I shared a photo on my Facebook profile, one of several that I shared that day. It was the screenshot of a tweet from Liz Strand (@LizStrand) which has been shared on twitter over 110K times. As a sexual assault …

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The Complete Mom Guide to Doing Laundry (In 73 EASY Steps!)

Collect dirty laundry from around the house. Don’t forget to check under and inside the couch, the bathtub and the cat beds. Place as much laundry as you can fit into the washing machine.  Don’t worry if it is falling out. Just keep pushing it in while pressing the door closed and quickly remove your …

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If Proverbs Were Written By Mothers

We’ve all heard those trite little expressions that everyone overuses. Like “A picture is worth a thousand words.” Or “One rotten apple spoils the whole barrel.” These idioms have become part of our vernacular, and some people just love to trot them out in response to any sort of complaint. I personally hate those people. …

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If Parenthood Was an Amusement Park

Welcome to the wonderful World of Parenthood, an amusement park unlike any other, where you’ll travel to dizzying new heights and drop to terrifying new lows! Where you’ll experience epic fear and terror while knowing ecstasy and amazement like you’ve never before felt! There are many different sections in the World of Parenthood, and you will …

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The Mom Dictionary – Words You Never Imagined Before You Had Kids

Ah, motherhood. It’s highs and lows are some of the most epic of the rollercoaster of life. And with its hefty rewards (not to mention the hefty price tags!), it is a ride we wouldn’t trade for anything. But having kids really does make us a little bit… shall we say… crazy. And we find …

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Rules All Little Boys Know That Moms Need to Understand (But Never Will)

1. Wearing a Spider-Man shirt makes him Spider-Man. You should expect web slinging and a lot of fighting with bad guys. 2. He will beg you for a cool haircut just like his dad. He will beg and beg until you give in and take him. As soon as the scissors or razor come out he …

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The Toddler Dictionary – Common Words (Re)Defined By Kids

My oldest son, Dexter, turned four years old last week.  And Dan, my crazy and rambunctious middle son turned two just a few days before that. I have no idea how it happened. They have grown so much and the last year has seen their communication grow by leaps and bounds. But as smart and adorable as they …

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A Letter to the New Baby From Your Wise Older Brother

Dear Chester, First of all, commiserations on the name. I mean, I can sort of relate. Mom and Dad named me Dexter, after all. People associate me with either a serial killer or an obnoxious cartoon scientist. But to be named Chester? I don’t know what our parents were thinking. I mean, Daniel is the …

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Nine Problems Every Nursing Mom Understands

It’s so easy to throw around the term “Breast is best.” We all know that breastfeeding is the best thing we can do for our babies if we can, and in this modern age, we can’t turn a corner without some celebrity or other tweeting or instagramming a beautiful photo of their breastfeeding experience. Stars …

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A Wave of Light – Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day

I don’t often talk about my own experience with miscarriage. I’ve had three in total, and each has hit me hard. When I was growing up, I didn’t want children. I saw myself as career-driven, wanting to make a difference to the world, and I thought kids were annoying and got in the way of …

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It’s My Body and I’ll Tie if I Want To

When we found out we were pregnant with this baby, Mark’s immediate reaction was to declare his intentions on getting a vasectomy. While he loves me and loves our children, he does NOT love pregnancy’s effect on his wife – neither physical  nor psychological. While initially we both were on the same page with how …

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