Now I wonder what else has he been dishonest about? I feel like we may need counseling, because it seems there is much more to this than he wants to share.
His mom implied that it’s the former girlfriend who is somehow standing in the way.
I’m trying to see how this is possible because she is married with two kids, lives far away, and he hasn’t seen her in decades.

I envy you ladies with even ONE child. I know children are a responsibility, but I’ve always wanted to be a mom. It hurts more than anything to be married to a man who basically lied, got my hopes up, and dashed them.
I see no real future in this anymore. I’m depressed and I have no home or family to go back to.
I would be homeless if we divorced, because I can’t get a job anywhere. I will most likely end up alone in life the way things are.

He made me believe that he wanted this too. What does a person do in this situation?

He didn’t have sex with me for years. Now he does constantly, but that’s only because I’m almost 40 and he will only do it with a condom.
When it’s unprotected, he pushes me off immediately as he starts to climax (apologize for TMI).
I almost hate him now. I see him as a liar, a possible cheater, somebody who manipulates and deceives people.

Before we married, he convinced me that he wanted children. It was apparently a way to trick me into marriage.
He had no intention of ever having a real family with me at all. This whole situation has been a lie from the start.
Now my eyes are open to what he wanted…a full-time sex partner (only when he wants to), a travel partner although I now have problems with traveling, and a full-time maid/assistant who does grueling work (but is still seen as hardly doing anything).

So I’m pretty much more of a girlfriend with some benefits. I don’t feel like a wife although I am one.
And he doesn’t want me to be the mother of his children. He married me (I now believe) because he felt he could control me and make all the decisions.
He says that isn’t true. I’m hurt by his inability to consider my feelings, or to even talk about it.

I’m starting to resent him deeply for this. I’m starting to see him as somebody who is dishonest and has a rather weird view of things. I love him, but he has damaged my view of him in some ways.
I can’t divorce him because I’m unable to support myself, and I have no family or friends that care.
I’m stuck in a lonely and difficult position with no advice from anyone.
I’m thankful that he provides me with a place to live, food to eat, most of what I need.
But his reasons for wanting to be “childfree” are selfish and manipulative.

One reason (that his mom shared with me last year!) is that an ex-girlfriend from his past may still be in the picture.
He denied it when I asked him about it, but I believe he’s lying. He might not want kids with me (or any other woman) because he hopes that one day she will come back to him.
How utterly crazy that is! He is also the type who likes to travel, gamble, and he puts his family above our marriage in many ways. He also has a female coworker “friend” that I dislike because they are a bit too friendly.
I asked him to stop having inappropriate conversations with her, and he keeps doing it.
It’s clear that he married me wanting sex and all the benefits of having a wife, but he wanted to live some “childfree” life this whole time (without asking how I felt).

So now my time has run out and I’m stuck in this marriage, will probably never meet anyone better who actually wants the same things in life, and things look very bad.

I am so sorry you and your husband are not on the same page. It is so hard. My heart is with you. I will say that I have two girlfriends who both wanted more than one child, but both of their husbands refused – one for medical reasons and one for financial reasons. Both were really upset, but they have made peace with it and have found true happiness with one beautiful child. They have made very happy lives giving their attention to their individual children, and they have found other ways to fill the gap. I know the heartache of wanting just one more, but I hope you can find peace one way or another with your daughter and your husband. Sending you love and strength. <3

I am so sorry you are going through this. Our hearts and bodies know when something is missing. It’s so difficult to feel like we just want that final piece of the puzzle. I wish I could offer more than platitudes. You deserve to feel fulfilled. Please think hard whether this man really IS the love of your life. If he truly is, and having another baby is very important to you, you’ll have to make some tough decisions. My heart really goes out to you. I wish you the very very best. <3

Oh bless you. If you can believe it, we now have four wonderful boys. Our fourth was very much a little miracle, as I had finally given up hope and was actively on birth control while waiting for my husband to have a vasectomy. But somehow we got pregnant anyway, and our little one is almost four years old now. I feel very much complete now. I totally understand how hard it is to feel like you just want that one more baby. And while it may or may not happen, I am really happy that you have three awesome kiddos you love and appreciate. I’ll hold you in my heart. <3

I’m so sorry, Jennifer. I have been there, obviously. Maybe give it time. Only four months after I wrote this post, I found myself pregnant again, and I now have four wonderful and amazing boys. My husband has since had a vasectomy to ensure no more, which is very bittersweet. But I think at times, if it is meant to happen, it will. My husband was 100% against having more kids, but it happened anyway.

I know how hard it is to deal with, so my heart is with you. But perhaps it will happen anyway. I’ll keep you all in my thoughts. x